The Fine Art of Not Talking

.. I have remained relatively quiet on some circuits the past couple weeks... (on this site, for a good couple of months)..

It's been hectic the past couple of months. Ranging from a disastorous move to a devestating miscarriage, I have found that I'm speechless more often than not..

Life is progressively getting back in order.. I find myself reverting back somewhat to the jolly brown giant some of known to love versuses the cynical malcontent I had become for a short time..

Rach and I ARE still getting married... Even with others whose idea on the subject almost costed me my relationship in general.. Yet another disaster that I had to fix in a couplehood that's already a bit fragile from years of her being screwed over by lovers and acquaintences alike.

And the writer's block continues...

WARSAW WAS RAW

*sigh*

So, Rachel is in Communicare and doing well... As well as to be expected but still.

Her and I had the discussion a couple weeks ago about her going into the ACSU (Adult Crisis Stabilization Unit) in hopes of her getting her moods and or meds sorted so that she can hold down a job and possibly go to college without her bi-polar disorder take hold. With the moving in full swing, inventory in a matter of weeks, and her going into the hospital, it's been stressful and I've been pulling at my hair alot. Cowlicks or failed attempts at developing a Wolverine like do. You be the judge.

So what was to be a 3 day stay looks like it will be extended as she has had a manic high this morning and her therapist wants to keep her under observation. This therapist is the real deal from what she says. The one she usually sees are interns and this guy she's talking to now is a seasoned pro (think switching from J.D. to Dr. Cox for treatment).

I visited her yesterday and got my ass handed to me in a game of HORSE. Half black and seemingly I didn't get the basketball genes. She gets to keep her cell phone and talks on when having a smoke outside. Otherwise, it's group therapy, one on one treatment from her therapist and doctor, and more or less working to get herself stabalized.

So, whilest she's in there, I've been keeping myself distracted. Listening to my vinyl records over at the old apartment while I pack, sort and clean. Moving with the help of friends with automobiles (her car is here with me, but no keys to drive it.. Don't think I want to anyway.. she's already worried about me burning down our new place anyway..). I'm going on an hour of sleep from last night and a pot of coffee and no doubt will call it an early night tonight.

My hopes today are as follows:

• Finish moving with the help of my former neighbor, Anna. She's become like a second mom to me and Rach and will also help me clean up the old place. I still stand by my wanting to drop brown dragons in the closets. The landlords have it comin'...
• Make a decent meal for myself. Possibly seasoned chicken, mac and cheese and buttery italian green beans... Mmm! Last night I was lazy and just had Wendy's and a leg quarter later that night.
• Take a nice walk and hopefully get enough cold air to knock me unconcious...

More to come later, just need to get out there and get cracking on the cleaning.

TOO BAD I HID A BOOT

So, yeah...

The usual questioning of mortality has popped up at the sudden, and may I add "soul crushing", demise of my high school chum and all around great guy Max Mcleod....

I know it's selfish, but when someone I know passes, it makes me question "When will be my time?". I think everyone has that thought at least once when they hear that kinda news. Also the "what contributions have I made to other people's lives if any" or the zinger "does anything I do on a dialy basis constitute as 'living life to the fullest'?".

It's just.. yeah, lost my train of thought...

I could save it here, but anything I may type afterwards will seem less than genuine...

Sorry to see ya go, Max. Rest in peace...

NOVEMBER RAIN...OR SNOW.. WHAT IS THIS SHIT?

So, November hasn't exactly been the greatest of months so far, either.

• Computer is still down... making due without it, but none the less frustrating. Rachel lost all of her favorites for the wedding (dresses, cake ideas, etc...) so will have to go back through if and when we get the piece of crap up and running again.
• The brakes went out on the Reliant.. Looks like whoever had this thing before didn't change anything in this car. I've seen Ruffle potato chips with more thickness than the brake pads that were pulled off. That's since been rectified, but seeing as though all the money went to bills, we had to do the whole check cashing thing again to get the money for parts. LAME!
• Thanksgiving is near. No good can come of this.

On the plus side...

• Butters is better! He's more energetic, he's making onesies and twosies outside, and is just being an awesome awesome mutt... He's a ham and a half and will lay on his back until you rub his belly. He's that spoiled. That and the second Rachel or I leave the bed, he jumps up there and lays in our spot until we get back (hell, sometimes longer than that... I've had to pick him up numerous times and move him..)
• Rachel. My dear sweet Rachel is conversing with people more. She's becoming more open about things that have happened to her in the past and what she hopes for the future. That and she got REALLY into the "Twilight" series... She read all 4 books, most being at least 5oo pages, in a span of 5 days. This coming Thursday night, she's going to the midnight showing of it in Bardstown. I haven't seen her so excited about something in forever. The other day, we watched 4 movies: Get Smart (awesome), The Happening (eh..), Balls of Fury (wishy washy), and the cult classic Orgazmo ("STUNTCOCK!").
• Work. I've been appointed advisor for the newbies... Actually, that should be up in the negatives.. No extra hours or money, yet I have to babysit..

As Black Friday approaches, I have to wonder if anyone will be spending money or will we have a vast emptiness as the masses sleep; broke and in a great depression...

That's it for now.

BUBBLE GUTS, OBAMA AND SUCH...

A couple of updates.

Getting over a stomach bug.. I'm still convinced it was the KFC I had the other day, where as Rachel and I both have had a case of the bubble guts with it coming out of respective ends (hers have been making the way out of the mouth where as mine takes a more seated approach)...

The only thing more difficult than getting over what I believe to be food poisoning is getting attention from Rach. She's gotten inth the "Twilight" series and has plowed through 2 1/2 books over the past 3 days... She's completely engrossed and I love to see her passionate about something again. The other night when she got book #2 from Shelley, I surprosed her by illuminating our bedroom with candles, had a celtic serenity cd playing, and had a side table with the following:

• Tissues. Shelley said it was a sad one and that she'd need them..
• Paper towels. We had pizza ordered and I wanted her to have something to use to clean up with. Also doubled if she ran out of tissues.
• Grill lighter in case the candles went out for any reason.

Needless to say, she was grateful and took it as something else. Not alot of reading got done that night.

So, Obama won.. We were up last night when the 11pm polls closed and it was made official. I watched Mccain's speech and applauded his "gracefulness", knowing full well the second he left that stage must have been a birage of obsenities. (-: I didn't stay up for Obama's speech. I wanted to. But my body was weak and I needed to rest. We woke up this morning and he hadn't been shot. Great start. (-:

That's it for now!

RIP MICHAEL CRICHTON

I MAN AM REGAL, A GERMAN AM I

Wednesday will be a sad day for me...



Election day will be over... I'm not so worried about the end results as much as losing all of the great ad campaigns on TV. I LOVE political ad campaigns: the clinging to supposed "incriminating stuff" until the last minute and launching it as to say "I just sunk your battleship"...

I am not voting (cast your stones elsewhere) because I didn't register. If I had, Obama would be my choice. Though I see nothing good coming of him being elected. It'll either be a series of assassination attempts that kill my daily brainwashing on TV or he'll turn out to be that radical muslim that 10% of America believes him to be (as if he'll pull off a mask Scooby Doo style and reveal himself to be Osama).. If people DO let him run the country, I see nothing but promise. But, we live in a very uneducated and, let's just go ahead and say it, ignorant time. He's already been attempted at numerous times and America's gun sales have gone up immensely leading me to believe one of two things: Either another civil war is going to brew in America or alot of folks are preparing for some attack that may or may not happen.

Me, I'm just gonna kick back and watch the TV like the good mindless puppet I am and see what unfolds. How patriotic....

***UPDATE***

Butters is getting better.. Today he crapped on the floor, but it was solid. No more Hershey squirts. And he's eating and drinking a ton...

That's one soul fixed....

The rebuilding continues....

We're going to the pumpkin patch within the next couple of days to get a pumpkin 2 or 3 times the size of the average for 20 bucks. We're starting our own traditions and loving it. Next is therapy Monday, and I'm tagging along and hopefully going to B.S. my way back there to be involved. Wish me luck.

That's it for now. Short and sweet, like Tatu from Fantasy Island.. "the plane boss, the plane!!" indeed.